didn't realize just how many people read this blog...

Gee, I guess I didn't realize just how many people are interested enough to read my blog! Wow.

In taking a look at my inbox this AM, I found a large number of people who sent me advice, well wishes, etc. regarding my present situation. And most of them seemed to be, on some level, worried about my general and mental health. It seems my posting of last night evoked a bit of concern from my readers. Allow me to answer all of you here.

Please don't think I'm sitting at home, waiting to crack up. I'm certainly not spending my days considering a warm bath, bottle of wine and a sharp object. Am I down in the dumps? Yep. That's to be expected, I would think. But I'm not anywhere near the point of no return, nor am I even close to the point of clinical depression. Personally, I think I have a right to be mad at the world (in a purely proverbial way...I'm certainly not angry at everyone in the world...just my circumstances). And trust me, I'm also not sitting and staring at the walls, unable or unwilling to do anything to help myself. I'm applying for work, talking to school districts, working some hours for the baseball team I'm employed by in the summer months (78 days until opening day for us...woohoo!).

However, I've been on my own since I was a teenager. That is not to say that I lived by myself, I had great parents. But they were older. My father was a busy minister of a large church. Therefore, they had a hands off approach to parenting me. And I think I'm the wiser and better for it. My parents did not breed me to be similar to the kids (and many adults) of today. I'm not paranoid about the world around me (there's nobody I know or don't know who is out to get me); I'm not frightened of every "stranger" I encounter; and the forces of evil haven't aligned against me in order to make sure I know I suck. I was brought up in a more mature, thoughtful and academic household...which made me a more mature, thoughtful and academic person at a younger age. Therefore, I tend to allow myself to think about things more than most. I'm having bad luck...most everyone goes through it now and again. But presently, my bad luck is more acute than most.

Be that as it may, I tend to just withdraw and lurk on the outside of social circles when I'm not 100%. I need that time to be able to be alone with my thoughts. Yes, it's a bit odd to the average person, but it's part of my personality trait.

And to top things off, dealing with the aftermath of my future wife's visit with her college professor friend can be a bit trying. That started this morning, and I'm afraid I just don't have the energy to put my foot down...at least not yet.

Therefore, just give me time. I'll be perfectly fine. I'm not all that exciting right now, anyway.